Profilectlx.Carlene Tan Li Xuan 11th July 1988. Currently 23+. Studied in St. Anthony's Canossian Primary and Secondary School, SRJC (first 3 months), TPJC, NUS FASS (econs). loves family, friends, chocs, western desserts, yellow, etc etc.
TagboardShoutMix chat widget
ArchivesJune 2004 July 2004 August 2004 September 2004 October 2004 November 2004 December 2004 January 2005 February 2005 March 2005 April 2005 May 2005 June 2005 July 2005 August 2005 September 2005 October 2005 November 2005 December 2005 January 2006 February 2006 March 2006 April 2006 May 2006 June 2006 July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 October 2008 February 2009 April 2009 May 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 October 2010 July 2011 September 2011 October 2011 November 2011 December 2011 March 2012
CreditsLayout by yours faithfully at blogskinsnote: links are the colourful boxes on the right of this column. :) |
abigail allison amanda boot caroline shuling/a> charlotte desiree diana felicia gloria jillian jingfang patrina kenneth kR mag michelle minfeng regina sharon si hui stella vanessa ya yin yan qing cin mei yi celine andy rachel benedict blogger blogskins chatter box |
Friday, July 15, 2005Today was alright, tiring to some extent cos i didn't sleep very well last night. But nevertheless, i was trying to perk myself up throughout the day. =) had p.e in the morning, heard bout the change in faculty system. felt quite odd though, cos i was just sitting not far away from scruffles, and we were smsing... quite dumb arh... haha... anyways, sabby got elected(or more like i sabo her) to be the p.e rep, but she willingly obliged, quite surprised at that cos i was feeling quite bad for sabotaging her, but oh wells, i believe she'll do a great job. =) oh, the 2nd part was funny, after we "elected" sabby, the guys rounded the discussion up with "electing" darrell to be the assis. p.e rep. haha... that was hilarious, it was as if for once, the class could agree to something in unison.so that was p.e, then came math lecture, GP and econs, nothing much, except that mr lim didn't come for econs, so mr loke took over and handed out results slip for the common test, and he's remarks for me? "Li Xuan is outgoing and cheerful. she sometimes get distracted in class. she will achieve better results if she pays more attention in class.". now the last parts made me mad, i mean hello... how much does he know me, and its not like i don't pay attention in class. i do, just that sometimes i look away once in a while, but that doesn't mean i'm not listening, its just i can't bear to look at his face that's all. hope my mum doesn't get cheated by him tomorrow when she sees him. *prays* next, came the killer. the chem spa was seriously a killer for me. maybe cause i didn't revise which i think is the reason, but my brain just wasn't functioning. i couldn't even do the calculations. how heart-breaking... i seriously screwed up this spa assesment, and it just had to be this actual assesment. argh! so moving away from that, i attended an overseas cip briefing just now, and the video was moving, especially when they left, its always the case. we estabish a form of relationship there, then we go. despite the many many language barriers they encountered, they still managed to leave a legacy behind which was amazing. when i first saw the presentation, i asked myself, am i up for this challenge, will i be able to do to the best of my ability to help the people there. will i whine and moan, and be complainy cause all these things are just unacceptable there. but then, i really want to give it a shot, because i like helping people, and this is the stepping stone to experience something out of my comfort zone, where i can no longer depend on my parents, and where i have t bring my tolerance level up to its max. and i'm willing to go that extra mile. =) the chances of being able to go are slim, but i'm going to give it a shot. and like the teacher said, i hope they pick the best people to go.. having said that, i think i'm done with updating, just 1 last bit. sometimes, we're blinded by this thing that covers us from all the beauty in this world in the simplest ways. sometimes we keep wanting more and more, and we never know when to stop, sometimes we don't even know what we want, and keep pushing things away, and only know the loss when its really gone. i'm confused, my buddies tell me some things i have to try on my own to understand, to get the feeling, but i'm afraid, i'm so afraid of getting hurt and therefore i keep guarding myself against certain people. i know there's this thing inside that makes me want to go for it, but my mind keeps telling me to pull away. i've never felt so lost before, lost in such a way my thoughts are all haywired, i can't think straight which is scary. i never felt like that, and not for so long. its near a month i'm feeling this way... oh man. i want my thoughts back in place. was talking to scruffy on the phone just now, felt kinda odd at first but after that i loosened up cause i was quite clear i guess? was quite OKAY talking to him lar, but he found it quite awkward as he told me later on, and his reason? maybe cos we don't know each other well enough yet. i mean duh rite... we just started talking like how many days ago? sheesh... but okay lar... oh wells... i know some classmates of mine are unhappy, sad, disappointed with themselves, but we know ourselves better than anyone else, and when we don't do well, we can blame no 1 else but ourselves, but i do feel for them, especially the remarks by mr lim. so curt and unthinking. i doubt he even gave a thought to how the parents would react when they see these comments. i hope they're alright. okay, shall end here. ciao! |